Thursday, February 21, 2008

I'm Only Sleeping



"How do you sleep ?" John Lennon asked of Paul McCartney shortly after The Beatles split. I don't know what Macca's reply was, but generally I'm a rock solid snoozer who can cruise along on six to seven hours sleep a night(does a catch up on the train count?). Five Centres had a rumble recently about how song snippets can nag away at night and stop him dropping off. For me it's certain red wines or random thoughts rattling around like dropped marbles that starts a wide eyed wakefulness which then sets in for a few nights.

My antidote used to be a quick blast of 'Melody FM' - Glen Campbell crooning 'Galveston' or 'By The Time I Get To Phoenix', Randi Crawford 'Tradewinds', or endless Carpenters, Helen Reddy and Sounds Orchestral tracks were dead cert's for getting back on the nod in no time. But since 'Melody' became 'Smooth' it's gone all soppy, stodgy and just doesn't work anymore.

This doesn't matter though, as I've developed a new sure fire snooze system so simple and effective that it works for almost everyone apart black eyed insomniacs. It's this...

Do an A to Z of something - films, songs, singers, places names, superheroes, animals..any category is up for grabs and so much the better if it's really boring. Having a subject matter focuses your thoughts, and the dullness of having to grind through an alphabet of anything will have you heavy lidded and yawning within a few shakes of a sleepy sheeps tail. Most people that I've recommended this to are back in the land of nod by or before reaching the letter M. In the unlikely event that you should manage to do the loop and return to A, try doubling up and duplicate two things that begin with a letter for example...

British Towns - Andover,Ashford, Basildon, Basingstoke..

It may sound crazy but it works, and as John Lennon sang..

"Whatever gets you through the night it's alright, it's alright"

8 comments:

Axe Victim said...

I like to get up, make a cuppa, wake up a bit, smoke a little, write a song, blog a while, go back to bed. Works a treat every time.

Planet Mondo said...

There can't be much time left for a snooze up, once you've done that lot though.

Five-Centres said...

I find trying to remember the contestants of Big Brother series 1 usually does it for me nowadays.

Planet Mondo said...

FC - BB contestants? That sounds like the road to nightmares

Piley said...

Gotta be speach to get you off Mondo. I used to put old comedy shows or talking books on, and I never did hear much more than the opening 5 minutes.

On buying a DAB a couple years back, I rediscoverd LBC (not been able to pick it up since I moved 10 years ago) and that does the biz every night (on the 'ol headphones)

Planet Mondo said...

Piley - I've tried a bit of Radio 4, but they always seem to do the shipping forecast when I'm lending an ear, which sounds terrifying in sleepless gloom.

Jane said...

great image!

sleeping.....whats that!

Planet Mondo said...

Thanks Jane It's from Beatles Illustrated Lyrics - Alan Aldridge

I've been having a peep at your blogs - there's some really impressive artwork and pieces on them.